A friend confined to me about her trouble with some of her friend. I did what was appropriate, listening. Well, I did give some opinions but it’s up to her to decide what’s best for herself. At the end of the day, the only thing that matter is you, yourself and your own happiness.
Which got me thinking about my own situation.
I now have reached the level, no, the age would be more precise. I now have reached the age where dramas in a friendship is intolerable anymore-in my own at least, I don’t really mind about others. What’s important to me is to maintain the existing friendships.
I don’t have many friends to begin with, thanks to my introverted genes. But if when a friend suddenly decided to refuse talking or communicating with me, there are three things I would do before deciding that friend worth my time or not anymore.
One, give that friend time. Maybe that person just want to be left alone for some time. I did before, one day I woke up feeling too lazy to talk to anyone, and it continued for quite some time.
Two, asking that person out, say for a coffee, along with few other friends-because it’s awkward if only just the two of us, after not talking for a period of time. If that person didn’t even reply my message, wait for a chance during gathering.
Three, during a gathering, try to talk to that person. And observe if it is that person makes an effort to ask me any question in return.
If yes, it means the friendship can be saved.
If no, it means the end of friendship until that person come and talk to me first.
Maybe my ego stopped me from asking that friend the problem that person had with me. But hey, give me a break. I did try to save the friendship even though those may seem like a lazy effort. The thing is, I’m just too tired to think anymore.
A friendship is a double-sided relationship. If only one-side alone making an effort, it is not a friendship. You need both to make it work.
If a friend wanted to walk out from a friendship, go ahead. If you think I’m not worth talking with anymore, go on. I will never stop you.
We are not kids anymore.
Love and hate whomever you wish.